No man has the right to be an amateur in the matter of physical training. It is a shame for a man to grow old without seeing the beauty and strength of which his body is capable.
Socrates
When I came across this quote as an acne-ridden teenager, it gave me an excuse. Here was one of history’s greatest thinkers, a man who spent his life in the pursuit of wisdom, insisting that neglecting the body is an affront to life itself. It resonated with me because I could intellectualize my need to look like Chris Hemsworth and the like.
But before you get the wrong idea by thinking I’m a gigolo—when I say my body is “for sale,” I don’t mean in the transactional sense of sex, Instagram sponsorships or OnlyFans. I mean that my body is a product that sells my discipline, care, vanity, and fitness coaching.
And yet, this journey has brought me face-to-face with the darker underbelly of external validation, the cultural distortions of beauty, and the psychological traps we all fall into when we commodify our physical selves.
But first, some cultural psych.
The Universality of Beauty
You might think beauty is a matter of personal taste. But research says otherwise. Studies on facial attractiveness by psychologists like Judith Langlois and David Perrett show that beauty has universal elements. Across cultures, people tend to favour:
Symmetry: It signals health and genetic fitness.
‘Average’ Faces: Composite faces made by blending many individuals are perceived as more attractive. Evolutionary psychologists believe this is because ‘mixed people’ are more immune to diseases.
Clear Skin: A sign of vitality and youth.
These findings suggest that some aspects of beauty are hardwired into our psychology, tied to evolutionary preferences for mates who signal health and reproductive success.
But cultural psychology reminds us that while the foundation of beauty might be universal, the adornments vary. In East Asia, for instance, pale skin is highly prized, reflecting a history where lighter skin denoted wealth and freedom from manual labour.
Meanwhile, many African cultures celebrate fuller bodies as symbols of fertility and prosperity. Beauty is both nature and nurture, universal and deeply contextual.
The Beauty of Cultural Differences
Cultural psychology shows that different societies not only celebrate different ideals of beauty but also embed them with meaning.
In Japan, for instance, the concept of wabi-sabi embraces imperfection and transience. A body doesn’t need to be flawless; it needs to carry the marks of a life well-lived. In contrast, Western ideals often prize youth and perfection, ideals that can leave little room for aging gracefully.
What’s striking is how cultural narratives shape our relationships with our bodies. Where one society might encourage cosmetic surgery as self-care, another might celebrate the wrinkles that come with wisdom. These cultural differences remind us that beauty is not just in the eye of the beholder—it’s in our culture’s stories.
The Story I Tell Myself
I’m not just lifting weights and putting them down again! I’m sculpting, bro. Just like a sculptor, the practice requires patience and discipline, but instead of a chisel, I use too many scoops of creatine. My body isn’t merely a fleshy vessel to carry me through life; it reflects the effort of my discipline!
… And a dark need for external validation and people-pleasing.
This mirrors my approach to writing and teaching. Writing well is enduring frustration and carving out something meaningful from chaos. To teach is to refine a lesson until it connects with someone’s mind. Both pursuits demand the same kind of persistence as physical training: showing up even when you don’t want to.
And like any craft, the finished product invites a public gaze. My body is for sale in the sense that it exists in a world that values physical form, whether we like it or not. It’s a reminder of Socrates’ wisdom: the body, like the mind, is a canvas for human potential.
Yet, there’s…
The Narcissistic Trap
In a culture where Instagram and TikTok set the standard, the pursuit of beauty often slides into something darker. The platforms encourage us to treat our bodies not as craft but as commodities, carefully curated for likes and shares.
Research from Jean Twenge and W. Keith Campbell on narcissism in the age of social media reveals a troubling trend: platforms that should connect us often deepen our obsession with self-image. They turn external validation into currency.
Even more insidious is the way this culture impacts mental health. Studies have linked excessive social media use to body dissatisfaction, depression, and anxiety. The irony? The more we chase external validation, the emptier it feels.
Selling Effort, Not Perfection
Socrates was right. To grow old without knowing what your body is capable of is a kind of tragedy. But in today’s world, the real tragedy might be growing old while obsessing over what others think.
The antidote lies in embracing both discipline and imperfection—like my skinny legs that make me resemble a moose. And to see our bodies not as commodities but as canvases for the life we’re creating.
So yes, my body is for sale, but for pursuing what’s possible while loving its flaws. Oh, and if you’re reading this in 2025, I’m single, so it’s totally up for grabs.
Born Without Borders is a reader-supported guide to the craft of nonconformity, cultural psychology, travel writing and how to salir de las fronteras que impone tu mente. Both free and paid subscriptions are available. If you want to support my work and help me upgrade to more than one cabin bag, the best way is to take out a paid subscription or Buy Me a Coffee.
If you are interested in English lessons for global citizens & fitness coaching (or know anyone who is), please send me a message or visit English for Global Citizens.
Share this post